Lanj: 2011/11/18

Translated from the original Japanese.

2014/02/07

Note from Nias: This account is ported from an old edition.

2011/11/18.

In a room in Flanje, Seren woke up. When he opened his eyes, Mel was there in front of him, her face red.

“Huh… Did I fall asleep? Mel… what were you doing?”

“Huh!?” She was startled. “Hey, I didn’t…”

“Is that so…. Wonder how I got up.” Seren looked towards the light shining through the window. “Oh, the light was so dazzling that it woke me up.”

“Oh… okay. It’s probably that.” For some reason, Mel seemed flustered.

“For some reason or another, my ears got ticklish when I woke up.”

“Well…” She squirmed. “Hasn’t the wind gotten into your ears?”

“Even though the window’s closed?”

“Umm…. Th-that’s strange.”

“But I felt something breathing on my ear.”

Sweating, Mel awkwardly said, “That was a strange waking-up, wasn’t it?”

“More importantly, where is it okay to place your books about the modern study of magic?” Mel carried two books in her hands. They were books self-published in last month’s quantity, holding research results collected up to now.

Frankly, it would have been better to find a commercial publisher, but self-publishing was the only option since things like the modern study of magic wouldn’t succeed in commerce. He had published it electronically, but he also made a paper copy just in case, because even in the year 422, paper books will still exist without being completely destroyed. But then, at this point in time, only elderly people read on paper without a leizen.

“On the shelf. It’s fitting for them.”

“Even though they’re your books, they’re pretty roughly done.” Mel made a mysterious face.

“The purpose of turning something into a book is assured by the land to simply be ‘who wrote what, and when’, so in practice, I wouldn’t expect to have enough people who buy and read such a book.”

“In other words, you wanted to leave behind the history of your research.”

“Right. This has twenty years of research. I don’t care about any of the sale counts or the publicity stunts. In short, I just want to make myself known as an author and engrave the fruits of my labor onto history,” he elaborated.

“But ever since I’ve published that book, I’ve reached the end of my research to a certain extent,” Seren said, appearing lonely. Mel approached him stealthily and crouched down to his side.

“I’ve lost the meaning of my life, you could say.” He exposed his hand to the sunlight while squinting.

“It’s not over yet for you until you let other people understand the modern study of magic… no, your greatness.”

“Greatness, huh…?” Seren opened his leizen. When he searched for his site, his official website came out on the first page. “When it comes to the modern study of magic, I, Seren Arbazard, am the one. Sure,” he nodded. “I’ve taken six years to build this position. Putting it the other way around, I’ve taken only six years to rise to where I am in a field that no one else studies,” he laughed at himself.

“Even so, I think it took an enormous amount of trouble.”

“I have symphathizers and supporters, and to say more, adherents, too. Thanks to them, I’m already satisfied enough.”

“Why?”

“It’s different than when I was in university. In those days, all I was called by others was a fool. Now I have supporters. In those days, I’d already carried grudges. Now, I don’t have any complex about the spread of my ideas.”

“Though when I look at the matter of leaving one’s name in history, I don’t like how the information about my research is only written in Arka. So I was wondering whether to translate it and make it accessible to Lutia or Altia. But that’s not advancing my research itself. By translating, I just want to be able to tell people around the world that there was a person who had delved into studying modern magic up to this point. No need to translate every little detail; I’d better spend more of my time on the research.”

“Sure,” Mel affirmed.

“In any case, now that I’ve reached a stopping point after publishing that book, I’ve suddenly lost sight of the meaning of living. I don’t know what I should be doing.”

“But do you still have room for growth with your main research?”

“Well. So that’s why I’m alive. But it would be aimless. I’m walking down a path without knowing if there’s an end anywhere.”

Mel held Seren’s hand tightly.

“It’s no longer possible to spread the modern study of magic to ordinary people. There’s no more room for growth for its diffusion. It doesn’t mean that I’ll gain more friends as I delve deeper into my research from this point on. The more difficult my matters become, the fewer supporters I’ll have. From now on, it’s my battle alone. I’m pretty bummed when I believe this.”

Lying face down, Mel muttered, “Even though I can’t help you directly, I want to be here to support you.”

Seren patted her head. “That feeling is enough.”

“Also,” he mumbled as if he were recalling something. “Recently, I had a strange dream. I’d always wake up with a pain in the right side of my chest. It’s a sad and painful dream. And the thought that it was always there floated into my mind. But now, doing something about that is no use. On the other hand, I’m worried that I might not be able to do anything if it happens again in the future.”

“A dream…”

“The main character of the dream is me, but at the same time, not me. I have a feeling that it might have been another me. But the extreme suffering that ‘me’ felt is coming up to me.” Seren pressed down on his chest. “The pain in my chest, as if I’ve never felt it, is being felt by another me. For years and years, without any time to rest.”

“Is that ‘you’ taking part in this one that I’m seeing here right now?”

“Yes, I think. No, rather, I think he might be my real form. I think the moment he becomes bearable to survive, all of the plans will be sent back to nothing.”

“Plans? Whose plans?”

“I knew inside my dream. But now, I can’t remember. The only thing I’m sure about is that they’re the plans of someone who’s supporting this world.”

“Sure…” Mel said before closing her eyes with a uneasy feeling.

“The dream of gods is unstable and changes easily. No one knows when its plans will change. Fate changes into engraved destiny (刻命) in real time.